FromTheFieldsOfGold

'… baby we just need a little patience…' Axl Rose's voice always reached her heart at this particular note and he, Thomas, knew it. It would be so nice to be wrapped tightly in his arms right now, safe and intact in this embrace, enjoying every moment of it, feeling his arms, his skin, his blood pulsating in the same rhythm as hers, his heart beating so comfortably against her back, knowing that their lives are interconnected till eternity in this moment which seemed to encompass the whole sense of being, of existence. It had happened so many times, that it was just so incomprehensible for her, probably for the both of them, that it would not

Cathartic Oh no, you aren't going to cry, Oh no, you aren't going to cry I told myself a hundred times I told myself a thousand times As tears kept dropping from my eyes    As tears kept pouring from my eyes… And then remembered were the nights When tears were to be relief, The savior from pain so deep It felt my heart would tear! And in the dark I wished to weep                              To make him, yes, to make him hear. But then the tears stayed inside Inside, corroding heart and soul Till all was left was just a hole And through that hole they fell It burnt; it hurt, oh yes indeed But then you grow accustomed

Had I not wished then to have had possessed you, Perhaps I would have noticed sooner The far-away look, the tedium in your eyes The way you saw my lips but not my smile Perhaps, I wouldn't have needed cruder, More vulgar evidence than those occasional sighs. Had I not wished I had possessed you… You wouldn't have made me cry And peacefully we would have parted Today, I would be able to enjoy the sun Remembering, in the sweetest traces Those distant times, the laughter and the fun Those sunny, careless days when it all started You couldn't have made me cry… I should have stopped it then, I should have seen The way the silent mom

They said you had freedom of choice They'd tell you to use your free will They made it seem real, oh so real And then bit by bit they took it away Like the toys In those shops where You could touch, even play But you could never ever take them away. And even when daddy pulled out A credit card or a bill You had the packet in the back of the car In your room But it still wasn't real Never ever, no, it was not at all real! Once again you could play, you had fun And it seemed it was yours, oh so much The car, or the doll or the house Oh, who cares, whatever it was! So you played, were amused and then… Bang! Or boom, crack, cra

Your head near the earth Your hair sweeping the ground Your cheeks turning red, then your face Granny'd say it's an awful disgrace So would mum But did you really care? Did you care, with your legs high, oh so high in the air? Your thoughts flying up, up and out To the birds, to the leaves, so the wind Could have carried them all through the playground And away, far away To the fields…. To those fields where eternity lives In the yellow, so sunshine-like wheat And besides, you knew daddy won't mind He's so careless; one could think he was blind With his hair in a mess and a stain on his shoe There were times… when he seemed

There was once a darling Whom I thought I'd loved. There are oaks below; There's a cloud above. Long ago a tear Seemed to veil his eye. Look outside! So near, I see a child cry So what's worth a darling Whom I never had? Why imagine tears If he wasn't sad? Oh, I lived in clouds, Didn't see the oaks And the toddler's sorrow Never crushed my hopes Yes, I walked in Heaven And I wouldn't wake But he seemed so real But every dream should break Now I see the clouds I walk among the oaks And at night my tears Drop onto his cloak

You say there is no stairway to heaven You claim the skies are nothing more than blue And cats have just one life, not nine, not seven So there's no point in saying 'I love you'. There is no soul, thus hearts cannot be broken God doesn't exist, there's no eternal good And words by thousands are pointlessly spoken You've nullified so many thoughts, to make it crude… The millions who strive to reach perfection To satisfy the yearning of their mind According to you do not deserve affection Just sympathy, as all of them are blind... Those fools who work, who care, who wonder Should just relax, chill back, enjoy the high Why stretch

It was the peak of summer The clouds disappeared It seemed they all sought refuge in my heart The sea of clearest blue Was warm and oh so clear As if the tears had made it even more radiant Those black, yet moonlit nights The evil glow piercing my soul The orange light burnt almost like your touch And then the wolf had cried So many nights, so loud It was with him that I could truly empathize And in the merry crowd A half smile on my face I missed you oh so much and felt just so alone Part of the jolly crowd A cigarette in your mouth You felt as good as ever, lacking no one at all Beneath the stars, the moon The dance-floor

The daffodils had gone to rest And dusk seemed far away No stars were there, no guidance Just lust awake should stay The sweet, yet perilous fragrance The air so soft and thick White sheets for hiding chosen Should make the fall less steep Hard earth the battleground tonight Its black should suit their whim And then the craze, the passion Should drive them past the brim Alas, the light blue morning Rose-shaded by the sun Had ended their long struggle With passion dead and gone There was relief, no conscience Would cloud the mind just yet Solely a mist, that of exhaustion Should dawn catch in its net Then those persistent

Control. His lips, his hair, his head, all under her rule that night. She felt vibrant, and powerful, oh so powerful. She was strong, both physically and emotionally, she was in control. The wine, she could feel its red drops all through her brain, was playing with her thoughts, they were escaping her, but she did not want them to return. Her mind was a little clouded, not much, but just enough to put a veil around any sense of logic which she possessed when she was sober. On the other hand, she remained far more down-to-earth than him, with only gave her an extra advantage. This night, all was allowed. It was her night, and even though he o

She built a house of willow wood under the hushed October sky and scattered moonstones in the reeds along the river banks and prayed for Autumn's sighs, to shake the west wind from her bones. She still yearns for summer's brilliance caught between the ocean's rocky shoals, and gathers seashells from the sand among the seaweed bed, and prays for Autumn's soul to haunt where once her bare feet tread.

i keep finding pieces of you. careless scars under the piano where you hid when the room got loud with flies. thumbprints in the hall closet where mother put you during storms and you thought the coats smelled like someone lying. a used shadow in the pool house, playing hopscotch under the old canvas tarp breathing in the corner. and on the porch where you slept, naked and lost in summer those raw parts you asked me to keep safe.

I want to destroy everything that reminds me of you, but I can't reach the stars.

   She sits next to you and your heart growls because it’s hungry for her. You smell her and when you blink, you imagine your head on her shoulder. A little gesture forbidden. A little touch that will never be felt; you just have to keep on dreaming.    You know this is because you are the way you are.    You know this can never change.    Her laugh soaks your skin and you laugh with her, noticing how she will never kiss you. But you keep silent and tell her about your day, during the commercial breaks. She listens and comments and does all the things a friend will do.    You make yourself not think about her. Two feet away, you

I've never felt your touch, but I can still smell your perfume. It's done, the us-part of our lives; but not over. No. It will never be over; you and I, me and you, we're still a part of each other. What we had, which really was a never-was that could have been, will stay in us until we die. It's funny, though I've never tasted your skin, I can taste you in my mouth. Your saltiness mixing with my saliva, making me thirsty. I'm swallowing you and you're making me choke. I've never felt your breath against my neck- You sleeping that kind of peaceful secure sleep you can only have with someone you love, but there's ghost warmness-of

I. We used to kiss at red lights, Desperate to fill our minds, our mouths And any quiet moment that we might be forced to think. Every caress kept us deaf to the screaming Of our better judgements; as long as we kept moving Against each other, we could keep moving Against the tide of apathy, of disillusion, of disinterest. II. I'll never forget the day you slammed the brakes And flipped the car around; no kiss, no love, no sign Of devotion, just crazed determination in your eyes. And then we were careening. You tried to kill the two of us A thousand times, moving back to safety at the last moment. Shut the fuck up, shut the fuck

Jeweled speckles across A canvas of darkness Like shy fairies They twinkle before running As soon as the fiery sun Comes up. Bearers of wishes Twinkling pieces of diamond Scattered across A canvas of black.

my nails are chewed my nail polish is chipped my knees are bleeding because i fell and tripped i got caught in the rain that's why my hair is a mess i'm going home now because this is for the best my hands, they make a heart they remind me of us remind me of the late nights in the theatre getting lost downtown on a bus running away and sneaking into the field whispering promises we both thought were true they remind me of the first time you told me you loved me and how shocked you were when i said i love you too my hands are covered in smeared makeup because i rubbed at my eyes i lifted up my skirt because you said you like